i seriously don't know whether to laugh or cry... the voice messages out at psychoexgirlfriend.com are so ridiculous and, well... sad. that woman needs help. although i have wonder what mark was doing this whole time to make her believe there was something to hang on to (if anything)... if you go there, don't click on any of the "store" links because the popup window hell that results is insane. i'm going to have to reboot my computer.

the newest inspiration in taco bell marketing has been announced. if mir hits a 40x40 floating target, taco bell will offer a free taco to everyone in america. now if they'd only put that darn dog on it, that would be worth aiming for.

confused about your gender? thespark.com has a handy test that will help you get all sorted out.

they keep deleting the monkey call from e-bay, so i have removed the link. sorry.

happy pi day! if you want to get a really annoying song stuck in your head, send this greeting card to someone (not me).

i spent a lot of time surfing the web today. it started when someone sent a url for enormicom.com to a mailing list i'm on. that site took me to blowthedotoutyourass.com, which then took me to 50cups.com i spent a lot of time reading through the last one -- very cute.

today is a beautiful day, full of sun-shiney goodness. i will be sorely disappointed when the shocking realization that it's not spring showers its way into my consciousness.

an earnest plea: i can't take the guilt. you know those friendship e-mails? the ones you're supposed to get back or else it somehow proves that your friends don't like you? please don't send them to me. or at least edit out the part that makes you feel like crap for not spamming all your friends and relatives with them. they're sweet, and sometimes very touching. sometimes i even have pms and i shed a little tear, like i would for a kleenex commercial. but i don't pass them on because my friends don't like them, so i just feel like a schmuck. please stop making me feel like a schmuck. thank you.

color me stupid. yesterday, i went to jiffy lube to get their signature service. the dude at jiffy lube told me that it was february 27. but that was yesterday, which was the 26th. so, i called my friend michele to wish her a happy birthday, and even made a point of saying that i didn't forget her birthday, but i was wrong, all wrong. it wasn't her birthday, and it's all jiffy-lube-guy's fault. anyhow, the point of all this is to say happy birthday, michele on the correct day. for once.

on january 26, i made a prediction that there will be a new subculture of laid off dot-commers. now, there's a website, dotrefugee.com that lends credence to my theory. their motto is clever as well: easy .com, easy .go.

little danny (or fuzzer magoo, as he is affectionately known) turns two weeks old tomorrow! he remains the cutest baby alive.

congratulations to brooke and ben!! baby daniel was born on saturday, weighing in at 7lbs 9.1oz. he's absolutely beautiful and i'm not saying that just because he's my nephew. honest. (also, in case you were worried, his middle name is paul).

if you haven't seen the lobster magnet movie yet, you're missing out. in unrelated news, my sister has given up on the whole araulmas thing. phew! (except that i'm in trouble for putting it on my web site).

araulmas? my sister is going mad.